“The Official Lid List Of Stupid Things Blamed on Climate Change:”
- Arab spring
- Incredible shrinking sheep,
- Destruction of Afghan poppies
- Invasion of jellyfish in the Mediterranean
- Surge in fatal shark attacks
- Boy Scout tornado deaths,
- Severe acne,
- Global conflict,
- Beer tasting bad
- Better Beer
- Suicide of farmers in Australia,
- End of the American Dream
- Bigger tuna fish,
- Fish shrinkage
- Longer days,
- Shorter days,
- Collapse of gingerbread houses in Sweden,
- Cow infertility,
- UFO sightings in the UK,
- Shortage of Hookers in UK
- Rise in insurance premiums,
- Heroin addiction
- Bear attacks in Japan
- Frigid Cold Winters in Great Britain
- Cancer
- Death from heart disease, diabetes, stroke, respiratory disease and even accidents,
- Homicide, suicide
- Coffee from Uganda
- Doggie Depression
- Water -borne disease outbreaks
- Bad relations with Russia
- Decline of Circumcision in Africa
- Heavier, wetter snowstorms treacherous for travel and ambulation,
- Lyme disease, swarms of allergy-inducing, stinging insects, along with mosquitoes and devastating pine bark beetle infestations and the spread of forest and crop pests
- Tigers eating people
- Fewer geese
- 40,000 dead crabs
- Shorter, higher pitched frog mating calls in the Middle East.
- Screwed-up love-making,
- The Japanese earthquake-tsunami,
- Horrible rash of tornadoes in southeast United States,
- Extended severe allergy seasons, Lyme disease, malaria or dengue fever, trauma, depression, high blood pressure and heart disease,
- Eye Disorders.
- Increased threat of wars, violence and military action against the UK.
- Migration of possibly rabid Vampire bats from Mexico,
- Extreme weather, disappearing islands and less productive workdays
- Giant Snakes
- Armed robbery, prostitution, and drug abuse in Ghana, will make you go nuts,
- The rise of terrorist group Boko Haram
- Caused the Seychelles snail to go extinct its alive and well),
- Rock Snot
- Increase anxiety, fear and depression
- Expensive Olives
- Cannibals
- No more red-haired people, women will become pear-shaped, incontinent, impotent bald guys with extra hair growing from his toes.
- Global Cooling
- Sinking of The Titanic
- Illegal Immigration
- Prostitution
- ISIS
- Walrus “Convention”
- Shrinking Goats
- Diabetes
- Brexit
