I can’t keep a secret, thats why I am so happy that the news has finally come out. Newspapers in Iran, Qutar and Syria have reported that Israel and the United States were planning an overthrow of Gaza and that is why Hamas had to take over Fatah. There I feel better now. I just hope the other things we are working on don’t come out, like our coup attempt in Syria via the opening of a Wal-Mart in Baghdad with the built in HR Block and the first ever Wal-Mart Chabad center. We are also plotting to overthrow the evil Iranian regime by opening up Starbucks all across the country. If they can get us addicted to four dollars a gallon gas, lets get them addicted to five dollars a cup coffee. For Qutar we have something real special, we are going to overthrow Qutar by sending them Rosie. Thats the most horrible thing we can do to them (OK its only the second most horrible thing but Senator Clinton won’t go) Below is the report from MEMRI about the “news” in the Arab Press:

Iranian, Syrian and Qatari Press: The Gaza Coup Is the Result of an American-Israeli Plot While the Arab League is supporting Mahmoud Abbas and the new Palestinian government, the Iranian, Syrian and Qatari press have been publishing articles and statements supporting the Hamas takeover of Gaza. These articles and statements claimed that the internal Palestinian conflict results from a deliberate plot by the U.S., Israel and elements within Fatah, which left Hamas with no choice but to carry out a coup. The following are excerpts: Iranian Officials: America and Israel Are Behind the Internal Strife in Gaza Ali Akbar Velayati, a member of Iran’s Foreign Relations Steering Council and international affairs advisor to Iran’s Supreme Leader Ali Khamenei, said in an interview with the conservative Iranian daily Jomhouri-ye Eslami: “Israel and America are behind the conflicts [in Gaza]. They wanted the Palestinians to be preoccupied with their own [problems], instead of with the struggle against Israel. The Palestinians must understand that resistance and [internal] stability are the only way to rescue Palestine… The Palestinian people elected Hamas, and now it is standing firmly by Hamas…” [1] Majlis Deputy Chairman Mohammad Reza Bahonar said in a June 19 Majlis session: “The Zionists are the enemies of Palestine and the Islamic world, and the conflict among the Palestinians, which was undoubtedly planned by America and Israel, is completely unacceptable…” [2] A communiqué issued recently by 200 Iranian Majlis members accused Fatah of plotting with the U.S. and Israel against the Palestinian people, which elected Hamas to lead it: “The current internal conflicts in Palestine are [the result of] a plot prepared in advance with the aim of toppling the national unity government and weakening the political power of Hamas. [This plot] was devised by a small group of people who support a [peace] agreement with Israel, and by factions affiliated with the American administration and with the occupying and oppressing regime [i.e. Israel]…” [3] Editorial in Iranian Daily: It’s All a Zionist-American Game A Jomhouri-ye Eslami editorial stated that Hamas had been fooled by the U.S., Israel and Fatah, and urged it to work for the destruction of Israel by means of armed resistance. “The dismantling of Haniya’s government and the nomination of a new government by Mahmoud Abbas are [all] part of the game prepared in advance by America and the Zionist regime. The Hamas leaders joined this game with complete optimism, without understanding it, and without realizing that Mahmoud Abbas and the [Palestinian] autonomy are part of Arafat’s ominous heritage of appeasement vis-a-vis the Zionist regime… [a heritage] that virtually obliterated the Palestinian Charter. “If the Hamas leaders now realize… that the architects and chief directors of the autonomy are toying with them and extricate themselves from this game as soon a possible, and [if they] understand – like the leaders of the Islamic Jihad [organization] – that the plan of eliminating the Zionist regime is the correct course of resistance, then it may not be too late [to fix the situation]… The players in the Palestinian political arena must understand that the key to resolving the Palestinian problem lies in the words of Ayatollah Khomeini, who said: ‘Israelmust be wiped off the pages of history.’ Today, experience shows that any other course of action is [indeed] mistaken.” [4] Former Syrian Minister: The West’s Support of Mahmoud Abbas is Suspicious In an article in the Syrian government daily Teshreen, former Syrian information minister Dr. Mahdi Dakhlallah wondered about the West’s support of Mahmoud Abbas: “The prompt and generous support extended by the U.S., Europe and Israel to Abu Mazen’s ’emergency government’ is questionable, to say the least. Isn’t every Arab entitled to ask himself why Israel and the West are supporting [one] of the sides in Palestine against the other? Will [this support] not create problems for the side that receives it, [forcing it] into political commitments that run counter to the interests of the Palestinian people? In the future, will we see Israel supporting a Palestinian Saigon [in the West Bank] against a Palestinian Hanoi [in Gaza], which would mean a blood-soaked civil war spelling the death of the merciful mother, [namely] Palestine?… ” [5] Syrian Columnist: The Internal Conflicts in Palestine, Iraq and Lebanon Result From a Zionist-American Conspiracy Aimed at Destabilizing the Region and Taming the Arabs Syrian columnist Muhammad Khayr Al-Jamali wrote in the Syrian government daily Al-Thawra that the civil war in Palestine is part of a Zionist-American plot aimed at generating “creative chaos” and preparing the region for the implementation of the New Middle East plan: “The political disputes in Palestine and Iraq, which have almost become civil wars, and the [political tensions] in Lebanon which are likewise exploited in order to push it into the same situation, should not be regarded as separate and unrelated developments. All these events result from a plot against the Arab region, aimed at destabilizing it and igniting civil wars [motivated by] political, sectarian and national [conflicts]. All this [is done] in the hope that, when the unstable and blood-soaked situation explodes, it will compensate for the total failure of the American-Zionist New Middle East plan, and will prepare the ground for the re-launching of this plan. “The political [policy] of the conspirators in Washington and Tel-Aviv, [aimed at] spreading destruction and undermining the unity of the Arab societies in these three countries, as well as in other [countries] that they are able to influence with the help of their agents within them – is termed ‘creative chaos’… “The long-term goal of creative chaos is to create new difficulties for the Arabs in the form of harsh and blood-soaked internal conflicts, and [thus] to divert the Arabs’ attention away from their fundamental problems – [namely from the need to] liberate Iraq and the other occupied Arab lands, and to support the Arab resistance in the face of the [American] plan to tame [the Arabs] and shape them in the American mold.” [6] Qatari Columnist: Fatah is Acting in the Service of the Crusader-Jewish War on Islam and the Arabs Dr. Muhyi Al-Din Titawi wrote in the Qatari daily Al-Sharq: “Fatah took part in tightening the siege not [only] on Hamas and its legitimate government, but on the [entire] Palestinian people, in order to make [the Palestinians] rue the day they elected Hamas… When these moves failed, the recent armed struggle broke out…. [Today, after the Hamas victory], Abbas still insists on taking unilateral decisions that… only strengthen Israel and put a permanent freeze on the [Palestinian] problem… “This activity, which bypasses the real legitimate [forces], serves only the interests of Israel and the occupation. [This becomes especially obvious] when we follow at the American and European statements… the support of Abbas and the attempts to wipe out Hamas and the Palestinian people in the Gaza Strip. This is a Crusader-Jewish war against all things Muslim and Arab…” [7] Qatari Columnist: Hamas Was Merely Defending Itself Against an Israeli-American Front In an article in the Qatari daily Al-Watan, columnist Ahmad Amurabi wrote that the PA was collaborating with an Israeli-American plan to neutralize the Palestinian resistance: “The Palestinian civil war… will be the inevitable fate [of the Palestinian people] as long as there is a Palestinian faction that pursues a policy and [perpetrates] violence in accordance with the Israeli-American agenda. The main [goal] on this agenda, as we all know, is to prevent the establishment of an independent Palestinian state under any circumstances… “This plan crucially requires to neutralize the Palestinian resistance, spearheaded by Hamas, and that is what the PA leadership, its security apparatuses and its members are expected to do. Perhaps we cannot say with utter certainty that the PA, its apparatuses and its institutions are deliberately collaborating with the Israeli plan that is supported by the Americans, but the PA’s actual behavior indicates [that they are]… “The Palestinian [civil] war is saddening, but what choice did Hamas have but to defend itself against the Israeli-American front and the local Palestinian force that was collaborating with it?” [8] [1] Jomhouri-ye Eslami (Iran), June 20, 2006. [2] ISNA (Iran), June 19, 2007. [3] Fars (Iran), June 20, 2007. [4] Jomhouri-ye Eslami (Iran), June 20, 2007. [5] Teshreen (Syria), June 20, 2007. [6] Al-Thawra (Syria), June 18, 2007. [7] Al-Sharq (Qatar), June 19, 2007. [8] Al-Watan (Qatar), June 16, 2007.