Last week Democratic Presidential candidate John Edwards implied that the War on Terror was all a big like–a bumper sticker he called it. Two days ago American Al-Qaeda Operative Adam Gadahn aka “Azzam the American,” said in a Message to President Bush said” Your People Will Experience Things That Will Make You Forget the Horrors of September 11, Afghanistan, Iraq, and Virginia Tech.”

These dueling statements are the cause of great confusion. If there is no war on terror as Mr. Edwards says then how can, as Azzam the American says, there be events that make us forget all of those horrors. I posed this question to my peers during lunch today. I asked what kind of non-terrorist acts would make you forget that list of horrors. I post them only as a service to John Edwards so he can answer this particular question without ruffling his $400 haircut.

This is the list of Horrors that we came up with:

  • Being Locked in a Room With A CPA and and Insurance Salesman.
  • In-Laws Moving in.
  • Tied to a chair and forced to watch re-runs of Rosie on the View.
  • Tied to an airline seat next to Rosie wearing an I voted for Bush shirt.
  • Having a chip implanted in your skull that plays songs performed by American Idol’s Sanjaya Malakar 24 hours a day.
  • Being forced to ride a commuter bus sitting in between some sleeping, drooling, resting their head on your shoulder and a woman on a cell phone who spent the last four days marinating perfume.

Thats what we came up with before Fred spilled is diet coke all over the table sending us all running for cover.

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MEMRI has the full scoop on what Azzam the American said, you can read it all below.

American Al-Qaeda Operative Adam Gadahn in Message to President Bush: Your People Will Experience Things That Will Make You Forget the Horrors of September 11, Afghanistan, Iraq, and Virginia Tech

The following is a video address by Adam Gadhan, aka “Azzam the American,” which aired on on May 29, 2007.


“You Will Go Down in History… as the President who Sent the United States Off on its Death March Towards its Breakdown And Disintegration”

Adam Gadhan: “All praise is due to Allah, Creator of the heavens and the earth, and prayers and peace be upon the messenger of Allah and his companions, family, and followers until the Day of Judgment. Bush, you thought you would be remembered by history as the president who waged a series of successful crusades against the Muslims. Instead, you will go down in history not only as the president who embroiled his nation in a series of un-winnable and bloody conflicts in the Islamic world, but as the president who sent the United States off on its death march towards its breakdown and disintegration.

“Oh, I am sure there will be some partisans who believed your lies and some fanatics who shared your murderous Crusader ideology, who will remember you fondly and mourn for you, when the world is at long last rid of you. Just as there were those who heaped praise on your fellow bloodthirsty nation-destroying crusaders, Milosevic and Yeltsin, when they passed on to Allah’s anger. But such minority sentiments can do nothing to cover up the ugliness of your crimes, the truth about your empire of evil, and the colossal failure of your global crusade.

“You and Your Mercenary Hirelings, and Loyal But Stupid Allies, are Easy Prey for Our Martyrdom Seekers”

“You may or may not be aware of it, but today, nearly four years after you hastily declared victory in Iraq, and more than five and a half years after you fell into the Afghanistan trap, things aren’t going too well for your Crusader coalition. In fact, things are going really bad. From Kunduz to Diyala, you and your mercenary hirelings and loyal but stupid allies are easy prey for our martyrdom seekers. In East Africa, where many of the war’s opening battles were fought years ago, the blood of your Ethiopian proxies is making the sand run red from Mogadishu to Ogadin, and from the Levant, Egypt, and Sudan to the Islamic Maghreb and Nigeria, new fronts are being opened and old fronts are being reinvigorated, and you and yours are feeling the heat. And, as confirmed by a new poll of Muslims in four major regional countries, conducted by the Center for International and Security Studies at the University of Maryland, Muslims continue to support and defend the goals, efforts, and sacrifices of their brothers and sisters the mujahideen and continue to demonstrate broad awareness of the evil nature of America and the threat posed by it. This, despite your worst efforts to distort our image in the eyes of Muslims and camouflage your true intentions. In other words, you’re losing on all fronts and losing big time.

“There [is] No Way To Undo What You Have Done… [But] There Are… Steps You Can Take To Curtail Your Losses”

“Bush, the die has been cast, and the blood has been spilled, and there was no way to undo what you have done. There are, however, some steps you can take to curtail your losses and prevent the number of American casualties at home and abroad from rising even higher. The champions of Islam, defending their faith and brethren against your evil doing, have repeatedly made clear these steps, but because I know that you live in a cocoon of your own making, and prefer to remain ignorant of what goes on in the world, I shall summarize them here. I strongly suggest you heed and implement them for your own good and the good of your people.

“One: Pull every last one of your soldiers, spies, security advisors, trainers, attachés, and so on out of every Muslim land from Afghanistan to Zanzibar. Should so much as one single American soldier or spy remain on Islamic soil, it shall be considered sufficient justification for us to continue our defensive jihad against your nation and people.

“Two: Stop all support and aid, military, political, economic, or otherwise, to the 56-plus apostate regimes of the Muslim world, and abandon them to their well-deserved fate at the hands of the soldiers of Islam. Should you fail to comply in full, we will deem it sufficient justification to continue to fight and kill Americans.

“Three: End all support, moral, military, economic, political, or otherwise, to the bastard state of Israel, and ban your citizens, Zionist Jews, Zionist Christians, and the rest from traveling to occupied Palestine or settling there. Even one penny of aid will be considered sufficient justification to continue the fight.

“Four: Cease all interference in the religion, society, politics, and governance of the Muslim world. And leave us alone to establish the Islamic shura state, which will unite the Muslims of [the] earth in truth and justice. A single word of American protest shall be silenced by a thousand Islamic bombs.

“Five: Put an end to all forms of interference in the education curricula and information media of the Islamic world, and impose a blanket ban on all broadcasts to our region, especially those designed to alter or destroy the faith, minds, morals, and values of our people.

“Six: Free all Muslim captives from your prisons, detention facilities, and concentration camps, regardless of whether they have been recipients of what you call a fair trial or not. Your refusal to release them will mean the continuation of our just struggle against your tyranny until the last kidnapped Muslim has been liberated.

“Let Us Be Clear: A Pullout From Iraq Alone, In The Absence Of Compliance With The Remainder Of Our Legitimate Demands… Will Not Save You From Our Strikes”

“This is not a call for negotiations. We don’t negotiate with baby-killers and war criminals like you. No, these are legitimate demands, which must be met, and your failure to heed our demands and the demands of reason means that you and your people will, Allah willing, experience things, which will make you forget all about the horrors of September 11, Afghanistan and Iraq, and Virginia Tech. And let us be clear: A pullout from Iraq alone, in the absence of compliance with the remainder of our legitimate demands, will get you nowhere, and will not save you from our strikes. So stop wasting your time and trying to save face with these futile farcical maneuvers on Capital Hill and start making some serious moves.

“It’s your choice, Bush – cutting your losses and saving some face by getting out now with what you’ve still got, or continuing to count your dead and pursue a bloody fight to the very end. Your end, not ours. By the grace of Allah, and with His help and power, we’ve struck back hard these past several years and, with Allah’s permission, we shall continue to strike back hard. This year, next year, the year after that, and so on, until the last Crusader goes home, whether waving a white flag or lying in a flag-covered casket. Our final prayer is that all praise is due to Allah, who gives victory to the believers.”