Its truly amazing, I doubt that there has EVER been anything like this in the history of the “free press.” Since Sarah Palin was announced as John McCain’s running mate there has been little talk about the implications of her nomination on the future of the country, the woman’s movement and even party politics. Just bogus news reports about her background. This is a result of the health crisis that was caused by the Governor’s nomination.
Many in the psychotherapy community are already calling up reinforcements and sending them to offices of media outlets such as MSNBC, the Washington, Post, ABC and the NY Times. They are creating grief-counseling groups, to help reporters deal with every time Governor Palin is successful.
The World Heath Organization for the Care and Kindness to On-Air News and Other Famous People (also known as Whacko News) has reported that Palin’s nomination and its aftermath may lead to depression and even possible suicide by the many on-air personalities, reporters, liberal columnists and even much of Hollywood. There is even a rumor that Barabara Streisand has lost the ability to speak English and now only speaks in ancient Yupik.Therapists in Europe who have identified the affliction named it, Whacko News Syndrome, after the organization that first identified the problem.
Counselors explain that in its earliest stages, this depression affects memory and rational judgment and cite many on-air examples of how this syndrome is played out:
ABC Newsman Charles Gibson is a sufferer of Whacko News Syndrome. This past week he had the opportunity to be the first national news person to interview the Governor. Her answers were so good that Gibson developed a horrible tic which caused his glasses to move down to the tip of his nose (where they remained for most of the intervew). Gibson totally lost it. Removing any last vestages of journalistic integrity, Gibson edited the tapes, cutting out key parts of Palin’s answers. Gibsons battle with Whacko-ism prevented him from getting treating Palin with the slightest bit of respect, and caused him to produce an introductory piece on 20/20 that just HAD to be written by the Democratic National Comittee.
At least Gibson is not alone; it seems that many therapists consider the problem widespread at ABC. Teams of psychologists, watching their political reporting attribute the network’s inability to show anything but the Democratic side of a story, a product of forgetfulness caused by Whacko News Syndrome . In fact, one report says that next to MSNBC, ABC may be the most Whacko News organization in the world. Barbara Walters is not, however, suffering from Whacko News Syndrome. Her dementia comes from sitting opposite Rosie O’Donnell for all those years.The group also cited MSNBC/NBC News as a possible network on the edge of this great depression. Interestingly the doctors did not cite Anchor Chis Matthews or Keith Olbermann (they said the two are suffering from a much more severe kind of Whacko).
A team of therapists is also heading to the home of Washington Post Columnist Sally Quinn. Apparently, Ms. Quinn is so upset about the nomination of a right-wing woman from a small town, that she has been seen roaming the halls, having imaginary conversations (in a Donald Duck voice) with a picture of John F Kennedy. When asked for comment, Washington Post colleague Bob Woodward commented how lucky it is that Quinn is in America and not in Canada waiting to get treatment in their tangled socialized medicine system.
Therapy groups have also been established for the Whacko political leaders who are count themselves among Obama’s best friends, people like Nancy Pelosi, Congressman Wexler who some day will actually live in the district he represents; former American president Jimmy Carter who so desperatly wants an Obama presidency because it will make his administration failures look good. A special WHACKO watch has been created for Tennessee Congressman Steve Cohen, who after fighting off anti-Semitic attacks to win his party’s nominiation for re-election, decided to convert to Christianity and now says that Barack Obama is like Jesus.
From now through the election, most news organizations will show increasing levels of the forgetfulness and bias caused by Whacko News Syndrome . You will continue to see the Democratic Party leader deified by the press; and Sarah Palin Slandered. It is crucial that we remain vigilant, and when we see evidence of Whacko -type reporting we contact the suffering network, paper or magazine and let them that they need a little help with their grief. Make sure to copy your cable TV provider let them know that these networks are Whacko and maybe they should be placed on hiatus until they are cured. Or write the companies that advertise on these networks, the pharmaceutical companies, the financial firms, and the folks in Detroit. Ask them to encourage these suffering networks to find help, maybe even to withhold ad dollars until they find a way to cure them selves and to stop their deification of the father of modern terrorism. After all, it cannot show their products in a good light to be placed in such a Whacko news environment.